Jesus Christ I hope not.

Not. to say that I don't want him to be. If he were truly satisfied with just me as a fulfillment for whatever dog equivalent of a romantic desire is, I would be more than happy, but.. is it wrong to say this isn't healthy, and then engage in it anyway?

Look, hear me out. I love Boyfriend, I love Dusty, even outside of him being my canine romantic partner. I love him enough to acknowledge that our relationship isn't perfect. It's hard for things to feel equal when I have to go out every day and work just to keep him in good health, let alone rent, food, utilities.. There's a lot of the day where he's alone, left milling about to his own devices. That's lonely. I know that's lonely. Yet, whenever I get home, I see him happy to see me, bowling me over, climbing over me, nearly mounting me there in the foyer. He's so, desperately, unequivocably in love with me; and I am too. But he still doesn't understand why I leave, why I come home drained, or why I'm not up for fucking every night. He can't! It's this constant, cloying reminder that he's a dog.

I was told once by someone very dear to me that polyamory isn't necessarily the same relationship multiple times, but the natural link between multiple people in whatever form it can take, fulfilling different needs or wants. I didn't necessarily understand it then, but after so long with my Boyfriend, I think I get it.

Which, really, is why I'm trying so hard to keep him socialized with other dogs- they're the ones who get it, and even if I didn't find the visage of Boyfriend tussling with other dogs super fucking hot I would still do it. He's a sweetheart, and if he finds some pretty little lady that he likes to spend his days with before he comes home to me, I wouldn't really mind? I can't peer into his head, and unfortunately I don't really understand the perfect intersections of dog and human relationships. Dogs can take multiple mates, either in their life or multiple at once. Even if there's nothing more to him when we fuck than relief or pleasure or some instinctive drive to hump girls, I know that he feels comfortable around me, that he finds my shape appealing, that he, if nothing else, if nothing else, has come to understand me as a bringer of food and shelter and physical affection. That's enough for me.

I'd like to say there's something different between me and Dusty that I wouldn't find in some other, more manipulative Dog/Human couple, but I don't know that. I haven't met any, and even if I did, I imagine they'd be quite good at hiding it. I just have to hope, watch myself, and give him all the unconditional love when I can.. but there's something when I look in his eyes, some glimmer of recognition, of love, that makes me feel good about what we are. That, when we kiss, I feel some tenderness, not because of his knowledge of care or compassion, but because he knows that's how I like to be kissed.

I guess that's enough for me.